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I was in a hotel near the M5, and I had a few drinks with dinner and got chatting to some other suited guys in the bar. It was just a few words here and there watching football. By the time it got towards midnight, it was just myself and an older stocky guy with a moustache and slightly posh accent. His name was Derek. We chatted away a bit more and he was asking if I was married and this and that, and he got round to talking about the time spent away by guys in hotels. He started talking about dirty magazines he found under beds in hotels rooms ( the internet was in its infancy at this point), and jokingly asked me if I wanted to borrow some. I had had a good few drinks by then, and said "too right". He told me to drink up and we went back to his room. The mini bar was soon opened and he was sort of joking about putting a porn movie on. I said I was uncomfortable with that - and I was. I wasn't really up for what I was beginning to suspect was a gay encounter. Anyway, he got a huge. More determined to have fun than actually having a good time. Around them, a bunch of overdressed and overly desperate underclassmen milled about, mostly centered around the kegs and their hopes of a cheap buzz.I sniffed at my untouched cup and wrinkled my lips. Cheap was right. How the hell did they get get away with calling this stuff beer? It was a good thing that these freshmen didn’t know enough to be picky, or the crowd would be even lighter.In short, this party was lame. Luckily for them, somebody (read: me) had decided to fix that.“What the hell man, I thought you said this was going to be the best party ever.”That was Kevin, my longtime best buddy and occasional partner in mischief.“Give it time.”“You’ve got something nefarious planned, don’t you.”“Nefarious? Me? Would I ever do something like that?”He chose to ignore my protests.“Do our generous hosts know about this plan of yours?” he asked, pointing towards the uninspiring group of frat brothers by the sound system.“A.
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